- A clean house is a sign of a broken computer
- A computer is only as good as it's programmer.
- A printer consists of three main parts: the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light.
- Any program will expand to fill any available memory.
- Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity
- Ask the Young: they know everything!
- Be brave. Computers can sense fear.
- Click now...repent later!
- Computers follow your orders, not your intentions.
- Computers have lots of memory but no imagination.
- Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of those things don't need to be done.
- Computers may be unreliable, but humans are even more unreliable.
- Computers will never replace human stupidity.
- Friends don't let friends drink and type!
- Home is where you hang your @.
- I blogged, therefore I am.
- I had a life; now I have a computer and a modem.
- I haven't lost my mind...I have a back-up somewhere.
- I wish life had an Undo function.
- If it's not on the computer, it doesn't exist.
- In God we trust, all others we virus scan.
- In my next life, I'm going to have more memory installed.
- Keyboard: a device for entering errors into a computer.
- My computer made me do it.
- Never let a computer know you're in a hurry.
- Old computer programmers never die, they just lose their memory.
- On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key.
- Our policy is to ALWAYS blame the computer!
- Please smash head on keyboard to continue...
- The great thing about a computer notebook is that no matter how much you stuff into it, it doesn't get bigger.
- The parts of your computer that you can hit with a hammer are called ‘hardware’
- The parts that you can only curse at are called ‘software’.
- There's no place like http://www.home.com
- To 'err' is human...to mess it up completely you need a computer.
- User, n. The word computer professionals use when they mean "idiot."
- When all else fails, read the instructions.
- You've Got Mail!